saying goodbye to sunshine

where are you..?
when im bleeding to death..?
where are those hands..
that was all over me before..
and now when i really
need them..
did you even offer me
your hand..
no!!!

you can always have me..
whenever.. wherever..
you want me to be..
and how about me..??
i cant even have you..
when i really need you..
its so unfair..

and its easy for you to move on..
and enjoying your teen age..
how about me...?
i have to think it over and over again..
if this is what you called love..
i guess you're wrong..
you never love..
you're never mine..

you're just waiting to see..
what god has planed for you..
you're waiting for god..
to lead you to me..
well god just did..
cant you see..??
the clue is everywhere
around us..
we never could resist
each other..
will never want to forget love..
and i need you..
but.. god put you into a test..
and you.. just walk away
cause you never really love..
you should see my sincerity..
not my past..
maybe you'll find your dream
girl someday..
but how sure are you..
that she'll love as much as i do..
i promise you..
you wont find anyone like me..
i made mistake..
i regret it..
i cry about it every night..
even before i met you..
sometimes people cant explain..
how things happened..

i dont know..
how can i love you..
you took it all away..
everything i could wish for..
you're not dare enough
to face my past..
to fight it for me..
im in this war alone..
i wish i never love you..
yaaa.. i wish!
i regret that i met someone so wonderful..
but he turn out to be someone..
coward!!
you could never love..
what ashamed..

like you told me...
you heart its not for me..
it doesnt belong to me..
and its so true..
i agree..
but did you ever
try to figure it out..?
why does you heart..
once with me..?
unfortunately
it was meant for me..
but now..
thats all is a mistake..
we're both are mistaken..
for loving each other..
this is wrong!!!!!!

im not the one you want..
yaa i could never be one..
you wont let me..
and yaa...
you could never be the one too..
cause you never was..
im all you never wish for...
but i never lied about life..
and what i've been through..
thought me more about life..
maybe you're too young to understand..

i can write you..
a thousand sweet words..
cause you mean so much to me..
you're special..
too special..
but now..
i wont..
cause i guess..
you're special..
through everyone's eyes..
there's nothing left for me..
for me to see..
maybe im just like everyone else..

and yaa..
you asked me before..
if i have something
that i save it for you..
maybe i dont..
but..
i have my future..
just for you..
the whole of it..
i can offer you things
that you couldnt imagine..
you cant get it from anyone else..
i know.. what i still have..
and im glad..
i didnt show it all to you..
i dont want to wasted it
anymore..
because.. i guess you just
never see it..
thats why i never been
appreciated..
you wont stay longer..
to see what i have for you..
but its okay..
maybe..
they dont belong to..
i can make you experience
things that out of your imagination..
but you wouldnt like it now..
and you'll never find out..

i regret sharing this
special feeling with you..
and it is because..
you never know me..
you never want me for me..
i regret that i love you..
till this point...
i wont hate you now..
i will never...
because.. i wont feel anything for you..
anymore..
you're gone!

i want to thank you..
for opened up my eyes..
to see what i have..
and too bad..
its for us to share..
this is not love..
this is life..
you come now..
and you'll be gone..
a pit stop...

now you'll have your life..
and i'll have mine..
i dont want to know you..
and you never knew me..
we never love..
we never was..
this is my last blog.. and im
saying goodbye
to "sunshine"

sunshine was for everyone..
its not for me to keep..
i should know where i stand and where
i belong.. and its not by your side..

be happy now..
im gone